(Q&A Last updated on 15-Nov-2016 at 06:05 PM IST)
* Note : New updates/amendments are highlighted in different color of fonts.
“What is happening between you two guys?”
“Where have you been for so many days?”
“Why no posts?”
…… so many questions to be answered…!
It feels Good, motivating, and positive…when someone is there to hear you, or share your thoughts and feeling… ! Thank you, my dear readers, for showing your interest and following my blog.
A few kind-heart, loving readers are really concerned about our well-being, and their such small chit-chats, comments, emails etc. keep me motivated to come back to eDiary (this blog) and post here the recent updates.
When there is no active reader, (no response…no comments..etc. ) it does not make any difference whether I am updating my love-life on my regular diary or this eDiary. Both remain silent and just hear what I tell them. Rather it is hectic and require extra work to login and type it in here, which sometimes, I try to avoid if I am a bit tired. That’s why I am constantly requesting active participation from my audience in terms of comments, suggestions or any feedback.
This post is being published to answer some of the frequently asked questions from selective readers who are keenly interested in knowing my day to day life details. I have compiled it in Q&A format, as I was replying them through individual emails.
So, now proceeding by answering the questions which started this post… part of which has already been answered above !
Q. What does the term “Desi Munda” mean?
“Desi” and “Munda” are two words taken from North Indian languages. Desi is a word derived from ancient Sanskrit language, and popular in Hindi language too, and “Munda” here is taken from the Punjabi language. There may be other variants in different languages too but as I am a Punjabi Guy, (North Indian) I can co-related to the meaning known to me.
Desi [d̪eːsi] is a loose term for the people, cultures, and products of the Indian subcontinent or South Asia and their diaspora, derived from the Ancient Sanskrit देश (deśá or deshi), meaning Land or Country. Desi is now, sometimes, used in context of someone or something that is “Original”, “Pure”, “Without any adulteration” and “Non-artificial (non-synthetic)”, as in “Desi Ghee”.
Munda means a Boy, specifically a young lad, in Punjabi.
So, the word Desi Munda (as in Desi Munda Says…), closely matches my role as an author of this auto-biography cum eDiary which has my thoughts, and some incidents from my love-life.
Q. How are you two doing? Why is there a delay in publishing new posts?
With your kind blessings and good wishes to us, we both are doing good now. There were some incidents in recent past but we have managed to overcome them. My apologies for delay in publishing the posts. Delay is because I am hardly getting time only on weekends to publish new posts. So, the blog update frequency is now “Weekly” updates, mostly on weekends or on holidays. I apologize from my readers to keep them waiting for so long. I hope, I will continue getting same level of love and support from my blog readers as before.
Q. So…, you two are couple now. Who is husband and who is wife?
A. With your best wishes, and Almighty’s blessings, yes we accepted each-other as life partners (Nov 12, 2016). We are still 2, having individual identities and trying our best to become “1”. Although, second part of question is not relevant here as of now, but to answer this I need to understand your criterion for defining the terms “Husband” and “Wife”.
Q. Which part of your body he is more attracted to?
A. Excuse me! ( … I would have preferred to skip this question if there was a possibility). I don’t know if he is interested in “parts” of me. What I feel is that he is more interested in me as a whole-piece and as a person and not in my body parts.
Q. OK. Let me re-phrase this question. Which body part of yours he is more sexually attached to? (OR)
Q. Are you a top or bottom? What about him?
A. I don’t know about him. I don’t know about me either. We never had anything beyond kissing and smooching yet. It has always been restricted to almost a sensual foreplay and seducing game only so far. He is kind enough to give due consideration to my preferences, my values and my wish (most of the times) during any sexual advancements. He has so far refrained himself from doing anything that I feel strongly repelled to.
Q. Do you love him? Do you find him sexually attractive?
A. Yes, I Love him. Sometimes, yes, I find him attractive too.
Q. Do you like to watch him completely nude?
A. As a matter of fact, No, I don’t. He looks better in clothes or at the least in his underwear.
Q. Have you touched his Penis? Did you get a chance to fuck him (or vice-versa)? When are you two planning to do it?
A. No, I have never touched his private parts (intentionally). I don’t like male to male fucking or anal sex, even in porn. It is a clear No-No for me, always.
Q. You started the story-line very well, and it was new and entertaining. But now your story is “stuck”. You should move forward and bring some action.
A. Thank you for your appreciation. I value your suggestions for improvement. But please try to understand it is not a porn-blog. This is my eDiary, which contains small incidents between me and my roommate from our day to day life. I try my best to be as honest as possible (to mention it as it actually happened in my life with my thought process at that moment) while I put them in this eDiary (blog).
Q. Are you two real? I don’t believe you. It seems to be a fiction.
A. Does it really matter? If you want to meet me (or him) in person, we are part of fiction for you, but still with you. If you don’t want to meet us, how does it really make a difference then?
Q. Do you guys ever fight with each-other? It is all a fiction like love story full of sweetness and melodies.
A. Yes, we do. Everyone in life has sweet and sour experiences. There are conflicts too. You are seeing us as a happy couple, just like the ones in fairy tales, because that is how you want to see us (or probably your imaginary character in the story). Most of the times, the illustrative images, and your creative mind together make the things appear in more vibrant shades than what is actually portrayed by the author.
This eDiary (my blog) is only containing parts of major incidents from my love life. It does not list all day to day routine or life events. It does not mean I do not have those grey shades in our life.
Q. I want to talk to you over phone / meet you in person.
A. I am sorry. I can’t help you with this. I cannot share any personal identifiable details or meet you in person. The reason is obvious. I believe you will also respect my concerns of privacy.
Q. You are too young to be employed. At this age, how can you be employed, without even completing your formal education at graduate level?
A. You are absolutely right. I am not employed. I am a student, working as an intern on fixed stipend per month with a one year break from my regular session.
Q. Are you on Social Media, Facebook?
A. Yes, I am present there too. You can access it on Facebook here. It was directly linked to my this eDiary earlier, and all the new posts were automatically pushed to FB. But some people found it as an objectionable content and got the live feeds from my eDiary (this blog) blocked. So, now even the FB is not getting latest updates for post feeds. But yes, I can be accessed and reached through FB also.
Q. What is your sexual orientation, are you Gay, Bi or….?
A. I was “confused”. With so many terms flipping everyday and so many changes I have seen in myself, I was totally confused on “Who am I ?” part. Luckily, an online ex-reader of my eDiary (this blog) suggested me to let go of all “Labels” and give your time and attention to just “two of you” – to see what you want in your life. I followed his valuable advice. (Thank you, Dr. Love! for this valuable piece of advice.)
Initially, before meeting this roommate, I was confirmed that I was straight, and had never felt sexual attraction in men. Things started changing dramatically soon after I met him. Within the first three weeks, there were significant changes in my likes, my preferences etc. that even surprized me. Although, in my own knowledge, I was still straight, but I was getting attracted to this roommate (not necessarily sexually). Slowly, I observed myself getting sexually aroused after one or two incidents as the time passed. This was happening only with him. I still could not create any interest in any other male bodies. Another online friend from Facebook gave me his expert opinion that either a person can be straight or he cannot be straight. So if you felt sexual attraction for him, close the chapter and be confirmed that you are not Straight. I took his advise and considering him as an expert on the subject, I started seeing myself as “non-straight”. I was still not able to understand why any other male bodies are not able to effect me. I tried seeing some gay porn too to check my identity and orientation. I still had no clue.
I was even confused, why the hell I don’t feel sexual attraction for this guy all the time? Some incidents between us caused me to feel repulsive and drift away from him. But again, Dr. Love (a nick name to one of my good online friends and reader) and some other readers of my blog gave me valuable inputs from their past experiences that made me see through the situation more clearly, and take corrective actions from my side. Slowly, I again started feeling good about him. I also noticed many times, that this sexual attraction grows or works only and only when I am emotionally attached to him. Stronger the emotional bonding, greater the chances of being sexually attracted to him. Further, it was always him who has to initiate the things, and ignite the fire in me to get sexually aroused.
Today (on August 15th, 2016), I came across a good article on internet and found a great level of similarities between my situation and the symptoms listed there. I feel, it fits almost 98% to my case, and thus clarified my doubts. Although, I am more than happy to avoid any labels now, and it really does not matter what you call it, but for some intellectuals, it is more important to label the water as “Water”, so that it can effectively quench their thirst. For them, I would like to be Labelled as Demisexual.
The article is a nice piece of information, for many others like me, who are undergoing similar situation in life to explore their identity. My advice to them is – forget about putting any labels to yourself…enjoy your life and try to understand what do you want in your life. You are not a “brand” after all which need a label. You are not a thing either. Still, it is nice thing to know that there are many others (although very low in numbers) like you and me. You may find this article here on this link.
Note: I shall keep updating this post from time to time by adding more question here. Currently I have added only a small part of questions that were frequently asked to me by many readers.