(Contd…from previous post)

(on Sunday Morning, in my Apartment)

I went in bathroom to take a shower, and when I came back around 20 minutes later, he was still sitting in same place and same pose without any apparent movements. It was around 10:30 AM, the time for breakfast. I was feeling relaxed and hungry after throwing out all my troubling, agitating feelings.

We have subscribed to a home Tiffin (luncheon) delivery service for dinner on daily basis. On Sundays, he serves the breakfast and dinner only. Lunch is not served on Sundays. This is weekly off time for Tiffin service because mostly office going young generation hangs out with friends in Malls or watch movies. I checked outside my apartment, there were two Tiffins waiting for us with our brunch. I took both Tiffins inside and left his Tiffin on the slab in the kitchen (the corner of the room, that works for us as a kitchen). I finished my brunch alone. It felt awkward taking it alone, but I have to get habitual to it. And then opened my laptop after doing my dishes, to spend some time on internet. That’s the sole mode of entertainment in this apartment without any TV.

After half an hour, I noticed some movement in the “Statue” sitting in my adjacent bed. He got up slowly, moved to kitchen to clean his cup and came back and lay down on bed, facing the wall/window on his side of bed (opposite to me). I spent around two and half hours on my laptop but did not notice much of movement in his pose or position. His Tiffin was still waiting for him. He did not take anything till 1:00 PM. It was lunch time. The only frequent movements I noticed were of his hands that were moving to his face frequently. I guess, to clear his tears rolling out of his eyes. That’s again a wild guess as his face was on the other side and was not visible to me.

man-crying

I got up, changed my dress and walked out of room with my room-keys and mobile to grab the lunch in near by food-joint. We used to go together till now. When I returned, I noticed him still lying on the bed (but in different pose). He probably did not touch his tiffin yet, because it was still appearing intact, and in same position as I had placed it in morning.

I did not ask him for breakfast, lunch or anything else. Why should I? I’ve decided to keep mutual interactions to bare-necessities, and I am sticking to it. He is a grown up man, and older than me by a few years. He is mature enough to take his care by himself. If he thinks this kind of drama is going to make any (good) effect on me, he is mistaken. I will now show him how tough I am on such people. First, he is guilty, and second, he is showing attitude on top of being guilty, instead of apologizing in a proper way. That’s totally UN-acceptable.

Around 7 PM, I placed both the Tiffins (my empty one and his filled one) outside main gate of our apartment. This is where the delivery boy picks up the old Tiffins and exchange them with ones having dinner. He had hardly got up from the bed whole day except when he had to use the toilet. I don’t remember if he has even consumed water in my presence. That could be a concern, if he had really not taken water. This is extremely hot and humid and may lead to severe consequences due to De-hydration. But God knows, if he is doing all this drama to draw my attention. May be, he has already taken it when I was out for lunch. My Facebook friend (remember “A” from previous post) also advised me not to believe him easily. Anyways, it becomes more difficult to reinstate the broken trust.

By the end of the day, I am still annoyed with what he had done with me, and super-little-boy-weepingannoyed at how he is behaving now. But, I also get intermittent feelings of pity on the poor innocent kid (at least he reminds me of my childhood memories) weeping right next to me and starving since morning, without even a single  cup of tea.

I have always seen him in a jovial, energetic, and fun loving, and even sarcastic moods sometimes, and that’s what his personality is so vibrant that anyone would like to be in his company. No doubt he is intelligent, mature enough to understand and relate to people and places, but this is rubbish. He is behaving like a child. I have never seen him earlier in this way. Is he a psycho? …. or just doing another drama..to play with my sentiments?

He even preferred to keep his face away from me, most of the time. If that is his response after all this, it is ridiculous. Even I don’t want to see his face anymore. It is more irritating now. Every moment is adding more darkness to the atmosphere that used to be fun-filled, light, entertaining and healthy till yesterday. It is becoming poisonous and suffocating.

I finished my dinner at around 9:30 PM and then spent some time online writing this post and previous one. It was around 2 AM when I decided to hit the bed. I know I am late, but puzzled with this kid’s behavior and the person I hated most since last two days, my mind was still loaded with a lots of unanswered questions that did not allow me to sleep early.

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5 thoughts on “After Effects of the Kiss (Part-3)

  1. He does not appear to be showing attitude, rather he seems ashamed of himself. He knows you have every right to hate him, and that he has no right to expect forgiveness. Which is why he is too ashamed to say sorry. You can leave him be, he will eventually get back to his routine and may even gather enough courage to say sorry. Or you can give him another round of talking to for behaving like a child. Which I would suggest only if you still consider him as your friend.

    1. Thank you Abhijit, for sharing your views and experience.
      Definitely, your experience and understanding of his emotions are much more profound than mine and would be more accurate. May be that I was seeing all the things from my angle and with only one perspective – that is mine. Even if he would have said anything, I might not have believed him in these circumstances. I was not in a mental level to accept anything coming from him. But now your (unbiased) suggestions are really a great help to me to empathize with him. You don’t know him or me, so there is no favoritism.

      This is why I was initially reluctant to even consider this kind of relationship and warned him about the situation. It hurts. I can understand the pain to some extent. I don’t want to see him (or anyone) suffer from such pains. But how can I trust him now? And what are the chances that he is really not playing with me again or not doing a drama to get my attention back?

      I don’t think it would be a good idea to restart. But if he is really in pain, I am also not feeling happy seeing him suffer like this and have a miserable life. Actually, if it is the case, I am feeling bad and guilty too. I think it would be better for me to shift to new place as soon as possible to end all this. What do you say?

      1. It is totally upto you whether you choose to give him a second chance at being a good friend, or end things with him and look for a new place. Either way you would not be wrong. But whichever you choose, it would be helpful to both of you to not leave things at such a bitter note. Tell him patiently this time that you appreciate all the care and concern that he has shown for you but there are boundaries you are not comfortable to share with him. If he can keep his feelings for you from affecting your friendship and crossing your boundaries, you may give him a second chance if you choose. If his feelings are too strong than it would be best for you to stay apart.

        PS: Me and my straight roommate went through something just like (maybe worse than) this. But he gave me another chance, and even though it was hard for me, I never again let my feelings for him cross the boundary. We remain best friends till day.

        1. Excellent. This is made me feel less guilty and a bit relaxed. Although it not really easy for me to take a stance, but you gave me an easier and more importantly, positive way.
          Thank you Abhi, and I really appreciate your big help.

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